I suffer with severe post natal anxiety after having my daughter. I found out I was pregnant in July 2017 and my whole world flipped on its head, I was renting a room away from my partner and was half way through an apprenticeship, only earning £3.70 an hour. My anxiety really began just after my daughter was born. I gave birth on February 2nd, moved from Wales to Shrewsbury on the 19th, went back to Wales on March 7th and then from Wales to Cornwall on the 28th of March -all this with a newborn baby to care for.
I had to be a new mother, first time homeowner and a new person in the area all at the same time. I would cry every morning after my partner left for work because I was so terrified of being alone and every little thing that happened would become so huge in my mind that I would forget what the true issue was to start with. I lost all my confidence and thought that I was not the best person to care for my baby because how could I be when I couldn’t even face going to the shop for a pint of milk. The amount of times I called my boyfriend from work was unbelievable and all because I was terrified of doing something wrong. I am nowhere near recovered and its a tough process to go through but every time I go out or do anything that frightens me I am one step closer to being on top again.
When I came across Untangled I just thought it would be another group of ‘perfect’ mothers telling me about their perfect children but, its not. Its real mothers with real kids talking about how they also feel like screaming the house down and that they too get emotionally drained sometimes and feel like packing it all in and walking away. It truly saved me from falling over the edge mentally because its truthful and brutal sometimes but its a group of women that lets you be whoever you need to be at that time and teach you that its okay to say you feel horrible. This group has given me so much confidence and welcomed me with open arms and I can not thank them enough for loving me for who I am.